There’s Nothing Holdin’ Me Back
by Zyr0Tayonima
Summary: A song inspired one-shot from Soul’s point of view aboit his feelinfs for Maka. The song is Theres nothing holding me back by Shawn Mendez.


DISCLAIMER. I DO NOT OWN SOUL EATER!

Story inspired by Shawn Mendez -there's nothin holding me back.

Soul Eater POV

I want to follow where she goes. She's always leading me into dark, uninhabited, abandoned buildings. "An adventure" she calls them. She's constantly dragging me along to new food stands that I would never dare to stop at in fear of food poisoning. She had a knack for finding trouble even on our days off of hunting. I want to always make sure she's safe. I want to keep her protected. That's my job as her weapon. I don't think I would be able to cope if anything happened to her, I would lose all my senses and I would never forgive myself for letting her get into trouble without me.

I think about her and she know it. No matter what I can't hide my thoughts from her. We're always resonating now and she can read me like an open book because she can hear all the thoughts running in my head. She knows that I think about how insane she is. She knows how I think it's completely unnecessary for us to live together, but she also knows that I'm never living with out her. She knows that I'm in a constant state of preparation to transform at any second to protect her.

Every time Lord Death or Kid throws a party she takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor. When we're dancing it's hard to hide my feelings.

I want to let it take control, because every time that she gets closer, she pulls me in enough to keep me guessing what it would be like to dance in the living room to no music other than the song playing in my soul.

Maybe I should stop and start confessing, I been shaking. My nerves are shot and I can't focus on anything other than her hands that wield my weapon form's staff. I can't take my eyes from her green gaze. She's thinking. And she's so much better at hiding her thoughts than I am. But I can tell by the twitching of her hands that's she's uncomfortable. Or if he hands are tight in a fist, she's angry. If her hand is on her stomach? She's hungry. If she has a book raised above her head, she's annoyed. Her mind may be difficult to break into and read but her hands can tell me exactly what she's feeling. Except when her hands are behind her back. I don't understand what's going on in her head when her hands are behind her back.

She's gone mad. I'm stuck in the ground as she's balancing off the end of my staff and she's got her hand over her eyes shielding the sun from her search. She finds what she's looking for and she dislodges me from the ground and she jumps. She actually just jumps off buildings. And she lands perfectly nimble on her feet. Even her thick combat books don't make much of a sound. She's much quieter than Blackstar when he jumps off shit. And she's running towards danger like it's a long lost friend and she really wants a hug. And I can't help but whisper under my breath, "I love it when you go crazy". And I know she hears it. But she says nothing. Just tightens her grip and charges faster into battle like my words were some kind of fuel.

My worries about how I look disappear when she's around. I don't worry about how my teeth are sharp. I don't worry about how my hair looks like slivers of snow that erratically stick out everywhere. And one night she's sitting with me on the couch and we're watching a movie. All of a sudden she leaning over my lap and begging me to smile so she can see my teeth. My lazy smirk began to form on my face. I could feel my lips curling upward and my dimples take shape.

"You take all my inhibitions." I say. Because all my shyness and discomfort are non existent when she's around. Her hands move my hair from my eyes, a secret I keep to myself is that when I'm home with her I don't wear my headband because I know she'll move my hair away. Just the slightest touch. Just the slightest tingle of cravings she sends through my body that make the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. And every time she moves my hair from my eyes, she smiles. As if she knows what's happening to me. And I'm pretty certain she does know because of our soul resonance.

There's nothing holding' me back. Well physically. Physically nothing is holding me back from reaching out to touch her cheek. Physically nothing is keeping me from crawling up next to her on the couch. Physically we're very comfortable with each other. We're very close in ways that normal friends aren't.

She take me places that tear up my reputation, like the library. I hate the library. And everyone expects me to never set foot in he library. But here we are. And here I am. Walking into the local library helping her choose her next weapon(book). She's looking at the books in the back. As always. But I grabbed a book from one of the first shelves as we walked in. And she finally picks a book to read. She doesn't know it. But I checked that booked out for her and slid it into her back bag. She'd find it later that night and then she'd read that book first. And she'd enjoy that book more than the one she picked out herself.

She manipulates my decisions. That morning I'll ask her if we could have Italian for dinner. And she'll say sure. And at the end of the night she has me buying pizza at the grocery store.

"It's Italian!" She argues. I roll my eyes and eat my dinner.

If my parents invite us to dinner with them at the house and I refuse to go. She invites them to a restaurant in town and asks me if I'd like to eat out at said restaurant that night. Tricking me into eating a family meal. Usually in be beginning I hate it. For a second I hate her for dragging me into it. But through the struggles conversations and the delicious ravioli I end up having a good time.

She says that she's never afraid and that I just need to picture everybody naked. I have a concert tonight and my hands won't stop shaking from nerves. I'm terrified that my crowd won't understand. But she tells me that they don't need to understand. Because she understands and she listens to my songs. My crowd isn't her for me like she is. They're here to listen to the music. She's here to understand me.

She really doesn't like to wait, she's not really into hesitation. She's popping the toast from the toaster into her brown paper bag and she's pouring to go cups of tea. Mine will have 2 spoons of sugar and a little bit of honey while hers consisted of half the bag of sugar, a bottle of cinnamon, some Carmel and some honey and then she shakes the drink with a closed lid. By the time she's done making our weekday breakfast I'm walking out of the bathroom with my freshly brushed teeth and she rushing us out the door to my bike.

On Friday nights we watch horror movies. And even though she can defeat A kishin with one punch and she can slay monsters easily, she can not handle scary movies. She finds a way to crawl up under my arm and pull the blanket closer to her to hide. It scares me every time she reaches for he hot chocolate because I'm scared she'll jump at a jump scene and spill hot chocolate on us. On Saturday nights we watch any other movie genre we want to. And no matter the genre on Saturdays she pulls me in enough to keep me guessing what she's thinking when she laying against my chest as I run my fingers through her hair. Her heart-rate, I can feel through my own scar when she leans on me beats slow when my hands are in her hair. But then as soon as I lift my hand to reset myself at the top of her head I can feel her heart jump and speed erratically.

Maybe I should stop and start confessing. Because when we're at the club with the rest of our friends she's dancing and I can't take my eyes of her. She can't dance a slow dance. But damn. Might I just say she at least knows how to dance with Liz and Patty. I know she's halfway drunk right now but she's still conscious enough to be aware of everyone looking at her. And that's why she remains inside the circle our friends made. She goes unseen by the crowd. But my eyes never leave her. She finally gives up dancing for a second as she makes her way to the bar stool I'm sitting at and orders more shots to down. And in that second I know there's nothing holding me back anymore, because if we lost out minds and got too drunk and we took it way too far, I know we'd be alright. And if at the end of the night we have to lean on each other just to make it home we'd still be okay. If you were by my side and we stumbled in the dark walking into our home, I know we'd be alright. Because when your this drunk your guard is down. And I can feel your soul whispering to mine that you feel the same way I do.


End file.
